I love the title, it sounds like one of those cliché horror films.
Anyway, it has been quite an experience these days to hear stories about marriage, divorce, pregnancy and bringing up kids. One thing I could absolutely not understand is why do the irresponsible people, out of all mankind, choose to give birth to a baby that they could not even nourish with love, care and a good upbringing just because they could not control their lower halves of their bodies.
There is something called contraception. Condoms should be cheap and available everywhere; contraceptive pills could be found in pharmacies and there might be more ways of prevent pregnancy that I have not known of, so why do you decide to bring a baby to this world when you could not even make a commitment to take care of him/her?
I am not pro-abortion, I am just saying that if you could not give a damn about taking care of your own kid then don’t let them suffer with you. Bringing them to this world when you are not even ready doesn’t mean that you are pro-life nor being “responsible”, it is being cruel to the kid.
What should be ponder on the decision on giving birth covers more than one factor.
Financially, are you able to provide your child with good lodging and food? Will you be able to pay for their education till they graduate from a decent school? If you were to divorce, is it possible to raise your child singlehandedly without trouble? Do note that raising up a kid is a costly matter.
Family; are they supportive of having the baby? If they are not, are you able to withstand the heavy burden and responsibility to take care of your child without any help? Do you want a family? Are you mature enough to support a family? Do you love kids? Are you able to give this kid an environment that they will be proud to say “I LOVE MY FAMILY”?
Love; do you love your partner to bear his/her kids and be happy to raise the kids up together? Is the child a fruit of love or is s/he just an “accident”? Are you confident in giving your child the happiness of a complete family? Will you be the responsible and loving parent to teach the right things (like love and kindness) to your child? Can you take the pressure to feed them; dress them; clear their shit and stand by 24/7 to take care of them? Are you willing to sacrifice your sleep; time and other sides of your life to love this precious little child you have?
Character-wise; if you are abusive/compulsive gambler/alcoholic/psychotic/pedophile, YES YOU ARE UNFIT TO BE A PARENT. Enough said. You cannot teach a kid kindness if you are not. You cannot teach a kid respect if you don’t give respect to others. You cannot teach a kid to be responsible if you ain’t like that.
For all that matter, I don’t give a flying f*** if you are married or not as long as you are a loving couple who is willing to bring your own child up in the best conditions you can give no matter what happens. And since love can’t be forced or foreseen, I don’t even care if you are a single parent as long as you are confident to provide your child with ample love and care.
Be kind, getting married because of a baby instead of love is bad enough. Having a baby without the ability to provide the best for them is worse. Don’t waste another life if you are already a screwed up.