Like a lost cat caged in this world.
I can’t really figure why I am feeling this way, especially when I had an awesome day. Made lots of friends and darling even came down to support me. 
These things are definitely what I should cherish, the refreshing new acquaintances, the familiar faces, the exciting games and events and most of all, a supportive boyfriend.
So… I don’t get it.
Why do I get this uneasy feeling at this unearthly hours when I am supposed to tuck into my bed after such a long day? Nothing really went wrong, isn’t it?
And then I realized, my uneasiness comes from the confused self within.
Don’t you get the feeling of being really lost of what you are doing with your life right now sometimes? Even if everything else was smooth for you, there was just this tad bit of “lack” in your heart. You get sensitive about what others think and then doubt yourself, despite the fact that it was purely just your own fear that activated your crazy imagination and assumptions. Moreover, let’s set aside how others REALLY thinks (and not just based on your own imagination), what do their opinions got to do with you?
I mean, why does it matters? If you were that crazy and random, just be like that. Being yourself is like being the happiest person on the earth!
Somehow, I am just not living up to my own expectations. First of all, I created LoveLivfe.com for anti-suicidal thoughts as inspired by the Taiwan’s Love Life project (for more information, there’s a link on my “About” page). Yet, what did I do? Nothing. How did all these blogger events that I went to/covered has helped my readers on living a positive life? Apparently, NOTHING.
When I mean “anti-suicidal”, it literally means “positive living”. So… Did I convey this message to my readers correctly?
It will be kinda sad when everyone else is merely “breathing” and not “living”, right? I hate it when friends around me talks about suicides and negative thoughts, because I don’t understand them. I don’t understand why they should infuse more negativity to this already-negative-world AND to their close ones with all these redundant thinking. Somehow, they affects my thoughts to a point that my principles swayed before I even realized it. So much for being a busybody and messing with everyone’s life, trying to make a difference and in the end, I became the one being influenced?
Dumb, isn’t it?
So now, it is time to snap out of it and get ready for a new chapter of life!
For every action, you must have a goal.
My goal is to be happy and spread the happiness to everyone else.
Smile and chest up, it’s time for us to shine!
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Comments ( 10 )
Very well said, the exact description of what I was feeling the past few days. Good to know I am not alone. I guess sometimes, we just can’t help feeling hollow inside even when so much’s happening
Natalie added these pithy words on
Jun 26 11 at
1:26 PM
Once in a while, we tend to lose focus in what we want to do.
A “sudden loss” in the direction.. Calm down, and it will be fine.We can never predict what will happen in the next minute, just take whatever comes to you.
Take care and stay happy! =)
Hong Wei added these pithy words on
Jun 26 11 at
1:56 PM
life looks very stressful especially in modern materialistic world we live in today where expectation are very high,it looks like the world today is no more human friendly.
thomas added these pithy words on
Jun 26 11 at
8:30 PM
@Natalie: It’s time for us to snap out of it and live life to the fullest!
@Hong Wei: Yeah, the “sudden loss” in direction kinda scared me, but nevertheless, I still love my life and gonna stay happy!
@thomas: It’s not that bad. Just look at things differently.
LoveLivfe added these pithy words on
Jun 26 11 at
9:03 PM
well i do think about what i’m gonna do in life once in a while..
it’s just not as easy as living life, breathing and going to work etc..
there is somehow something in me that wants to make an impact in the world..
and im still figuring it out..
ken added these pithy words on
Jun 27 11 at
11:03 AM
@kelvin: As long as you are still breathing, there’s a chance to live your life to the fullest.
@ken: I agree, it’s not easy but to be honest, most of our lives in Singapore are already much better as compared to those in other undeveloped countries. I am constantly searching for myself too, which I believe I will find it somehow; somewhere; somewhat. Life is full of possibilities and I am excited to find out more! I believe you would figure it out one day too.
LoveLivfe added these pithy words on
Jun 27 11 at
11:40 AM
maybe some charity work? when we help others we are doing soul-searching and we benefit from the experience too
I always feel positive vibes reading your blog
sengkangbabies added these pithy words on
Jul 01 11 at
12:00 AM
@sengkangbabies: You are being so sweet! I guess my positive vibes aren’t enough for me yet! Haha. And yup, maybe I shld commit more time into doing charity work.
LoveLivfe added these pithy words on
Jul 01 11 at
1:09 AM
This is a great blogpost! I understand what you mean. Sometimes it’s just hard to be positive all the time. But somehow I think the friends talking about negative and sucidal thoughts… perhaps they were just looking for some social support? We all know how talking helps to keep you less stressed!
I really like the intention behind your blog
Mirai added these pithy words on
Sep 04 11 at
12:13 PM
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